Everyone Googles random things. That’s why Google exists. It’s so you can say “Who is that actor in that movie?” “How do you cook a potato?” “Does peanut butter expire?” “Is it safe to eat these leftovers after 3 days?” All things that I or someone close to me has recently Googled. It’s normal. You are weird if you don’t do it. Anxiety Googling, my friends, is a whole other thing. I consider it “Anxiety Googling” when you are laying there at 1 am and you are trying to sleep but this question is just driving you nuts. It is when you tell yourself NOT to google it because it will probably tell you that you are dying and it will make it worse but you just HAVE to. It is when you know that if someone saw your browser history they would be like “what is wrong with her?” To make you feel less alone for your anxiety googling ways and so you can all continue to think “what is wrong with this girl?” here are a few of my recent 1 am searches and some things I learned from them. Note the trend of baby and post baby having related things. This is my life now you see. In no particular order and from the top of my head here are just a few of my searches: Why can I feel my heartbeat in my abdomen? (Top answer: I have an aneurism. But thankfully I am not a middle aged man so that’s not likely) Why are my muscles tight and sore? (can be a side effect of hypertension caused by anxiety. Who knew?) Why do my hands tingle? (Carpal tunnel or hypertension. Darn you anxiety) How much sleep can you function off of? (very little. I survived a newborn. I know this for certain) Difference between migraine and a headache (head hurt. Don’t remember) Why doesn’t my baby roll? (I am a horror blue mother or more likely: She doesn’t want to) Why doesn’t my baby crawl? (I am a horrible failure of s mother or more likely: she doesn’t want to) Is it ok for babies to skip crawling and walk instead? (yes) Why doesn’t my baby eat solids? (Again. She doesn’t want to... yet) Can babies have rice? (After I gave her rice for dinner. Surprisingly conflicting answers) Does my baby sleep too much? (I miss when that was a problem) How to get a baby to sleep at night Or Why does my baby wake up at night? (Ranges from because you are a failure of a mother to because they just do) (Side note she is sleeping much better now! Yay!) Work at home options/job opportunities (I don’t wanna go back to work I want to be on mat leave foreeeeevvvveeeerrrr) How close should siblings be in age? Conversely Pros and Cons of being one and done (no real answers on either it seems. Conclusion: do whatever you want) Hairstyle trends 2018 (I had a hair appointment the next day) How often should you give your baby a bath? (Range from every day to never) Will my baby have psoriasis (I do. It sucks. 10% chance) Will my baby have anxiety (inconclusive) Is my baby teething/how to tell if a baby is teething/teething vs cold/how to help a teething baby (conclusion: teething sucks and you don’t know until a tooth appears) Baby milestones for 1 month old/2 month old/3 month old…. (I should never look at this) I think that is enough for now. Have you ever googled any of these things? Have you ever found yourself reaching for your phone even though you should be sleeping at 1 am? Well at least now you know you are not alone. If nothing else I hope you got a chuckle at my expense! All the best and go to sleep. You probably will forget what you wanted to google in the morning. Who am I kidding? Just get it over with.
